Subsequent Pregnancy After a Loss Support

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Joining SPALS

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Michael Nettleton
Subscriptions, bios, digest, our pregnant moms list, SPALS Tips, web page, technical information & general enquiries

Sara Grimes
General enquiries and history of SPALS



Subscription Process

Subscribing to SPALS is a three-step process:

  1. Apply to SPALS with a message to our Majordomo listserver.
  2. Prepare a short bio and email it to our list administrators.
  3. Our list administrators will confirm your subscription.

Because of the sensitive nature of subsequent pregnancy discussions on SPALS, our subscription process aims to protect the privacy of list subscribers. All subscription requests must be accompanied by a short bio that will be reviewed by list administrators to determine whether or not you fit into the SPALS profile.

Current members' bios are archived into a Bio List and are available upon request only to other current SPALS subscribers.

1. Apply to SPALS

To apply to the SPALS list, send an email message with the text:


to our mailing list manager <>. Leave the subject of your message blank. Do not include any other text in the body of the message -- and if possible, do not send the message with formatted text. Do not use the <>'s listed in the Majordomo address.

NOTE: Please be sure to send your subscribe message with unformatted text (no fonts, text sizes or colours). Some common mail programs (MS Outlook and Outlook Express) send formatted text by default. Because of the additional formatting codes used for formatted text, your message may not be interpreted correctly by the Majordomo, and if so, it may not record your request to subscribe.

Even if your message appears to be returned or rejected by the Majordomo, please proceed with submitting a bio (step 2). As long as we receive your bio, we will be able to process your request for subscription to SPALS.

If you need further help subscribing, email to list administrator Michael Nettleton at <>.

2. Submit a bio

At the same time, prepare a short bio, containing only the facts of your situation (your full name, living and deceased children's names and dates, your current pregnancy status, your location in the form [country / state / city] and the mother's age). Email your bio to list administrator Michael Nettleton at <> with the subject "SPALS bio".

We prefer a standard format for your bio information -- please see our Bio Guidelines for information on constructing a bio.

3. Wait for confirmation

Subscription is not automatic. One of our list administrators will review your bio and respond to your subscription request. We aim to respond quickly -- usually, we are able to respond within 24 hours. Sometimes it may take a day or two. If you want to check on a subscription request, please send us a note.

NOTE: During certain holiday times (July, August and the end of December) our administrators may be away from email for up to 14 days. We appeal for your patience during such times.

While you are awaiting confirmation of your subscription, be sure to read through the SPALS Charter, SPALS Code of Conduct. SPALS Guidelines and SPALS Tips -- and also familiarize yourself with the SPALS FAQs.

Bio Guidelines

We have prepared these guidelines to help you prepare a bio to subscribe to SPALS. Here is a sample of what we are looking for (see below for more examples): Sara Grimes
Haven Rose (05-09-95 - 05-12-95) at 23.5 wks due to severe maternal preeclampsia, died from sepsis infection & severe prematurity. Living child: Drake McLean (07-23-96). Chronic hypertension & recurring preeclampsia. PM due 04-22-01. Mom is 39. Dad (Greg) is 40.
USA / Missouri / Columbia

Full Name:

We must have your full name to subscribe you to SPALS. This will appear in your bio listing for other subscribers.

EMail Address:

Provide the email address you will use to read and post to SPALS. If this is not the same as the address you are posting from, please explain why.

Brief Profile:

Provide the name(s) and birth/death date(s) of your child(ren), including living children, and any pertinent facts about your loss experience(s). Include your due date, if applicable. All dates should be in the form mm-dd-yy. Due to space limitations, try keep your bio under 255 characters. Please do not send anything very detailed -- list members will learn the rest of your story from your introductory post and in discussion. See below for examples and abbreviations for member bios.

Age of Mother:

Please list your age in years (or your partner's age if you are a father). The vast majority of our subscribers list their age in their bios. Many also list their partner's age.


Please list your location in the form [Country / State / City or nearest urban area]. The majority of our subscribers list their location in their bios. You may also use [Country / State] if you prefer a more general location.

Phone Number(s):

We ask that you provide your telephone number. Sara Grimes and Michael Nettleton, our list administrators, keep a confidential list of telephone numbers. This list is not published in any form. Only a list administrator will ever contact you directly, if needed.

Examples: Michael Nettleton
Robyn Alexandra (b/d 09-11-91) from polyhydramnios arising from twin transfusion. Living children: identical twin, Carolyn Emily (b 09-11-91) survived being 9 wks early; Gregory Adam (09-24-95); Theresa Kathryn (04-08-98). Mom (Judy) is 41. Dad is 41.
Canada / Ontario / Toronto Sally Simpson & Samuel Silverstein
IRC: Salada
Mscg 12-94. Shelley mscg 07-95. Shawna (s/b 23 Sep 96) due to unknown causes. TM. Mom is 24. Dad is 28.
USA / New York / Rochester area Fran Foster
1st child Kaylee Rita (11-12-95 - 11-15-95) at 39 1/2 wks, APGAR=0, resuscitated, reason for death unknown. Pg complicated with untreated high BP. Mscg (12-96) at 7 wks. PTM. Mom is 39.
Australia / New South Wales / Sydney Heather Davidson
Living son Geoffrey (12-12-91). Loss (07-13-96) at 19 1/2 wks due to severe genetic anomalies & Downs Syndrome. Clomid. PM due 11-01-01. Mom is 35.
USA / California / Oakland

All dates are mm-dd-yy


mscg = miscarriage / loss
wks = weeks gestation
b/d = born / died
s/b = stillborn
PM = "pregnant mom" = currently pregnant
TM = "trying mom" = currently trying
PTM = "pre trying mom" = waiting to try again